Shepard's New Squadmates
by Hulkfan96
Summary: When Hulk and Iron Man get sucked into the Mass Effect universe, they become part of something bigger.
1. New Universe, New Faces

( **Takes place in a version of the Marvel universe where Hulk is intellectual and capable of more fluent wording** )

* * *

- **Earth 616** -

 **Outer Space**

Hulk and Iron Man are in a space shuttle, on their way to investigate a space station that is filled with gamma radiation. As Hulk enters, he spots human corpses floating around as well as noticing the lights aren't working. " **Stark, I made it in, but the lights are off, and there's dead bodies floating all over the place**." Hulk says into a wrist-mounted communication device tied to the Avengers' radio frequency.

"The artificial gravity must be offline, green. We gotta restore power to the station." Iron Man says as Hulk ventures deeper into the station, eventually coming across the control console for the station. He talks Hulk through getting the power back online.

" **Ha! There we go! Stark, we have power**!" Hulk says as his feet touch the ground, indicating the artificial gravity was back online as the lights come on seconds later. Iron Man enters the space station and meets up with Hulk.

"Green, I'm getting strange energy readings. Probably some interdimensional portal that's about to emerge. We better do our job and get out of here." Iron Man says, not wanting to be around when those readings go off the charts.

Hulk grunts in answer. " **Right**." As soon as he says this, the aforementioned interdimensional portal appears outside the space station. Despite Hulk's gravity boots and Iron Man's thrusters, the two heroes are sucked in as the portal closes.

* * *

- **Alternate Universe** -

 **SRS Normandy**

Commander Jane Shepard is on the bridge of the Normandy when Joker can be heard over the loudspeaker. "Commander, you might want to see this."

"What is it, Joker?" Shepard asks.

"Uh, I got eyes on a guy in an armored suit and a...big, half naked green man..." Joker says in confusion as Hulk and Iron Man float around in the empty void of space, the force of the portal having knocked them out.

"Use the tractor beam on them. Get them into the shuttle bay now!" Shepard orders as she heads to the aforementioned shuttle bay.

* * *

- **Shuttle Bay** -

As Hulk and Iron Man are saved from the cold vacuum of space, everyone watches in awe as Hulk turns into Bruce Banner.

"What the _hell_ is that thing?" Ashley Williams asks in response to Hulk turning into his human form.

"Quite an interesting human...or whatever he is." Liara T'Soni says with inquisitive interest at Hulk's other self.

"Got yourself a crush there, doc?" Ashley teases.

Liara gets flustered at Ashley's teasing. "I...I do not have a crush, Miss Williams. Do not be absurd."

"Hey, I'm not judging." Ashley retorts with a smile.

"Get these two to the medbay." Shepard orders as Grunt picks the two up and carries them away. "Those two are in for a shock when they wake up..."

* * *

- **Later** -

 **Medbay**

As the two men lay unconscious, Miranda, under orders from the Illusive Man, plants a control chip into Bruce, as she felt like there was a 'great power' inside him. Hours later, Bruce wakes up, strapped to a medical gurney while Stark lays unrestrained and still in his armor, though his faceplate has now been opened. "Tony? Tony." He softly says, trying to wake him up. "Where are we? This doesn't look like any base or outpost."

Tony stirs as he wakes up and looks at Bruce as a beautiful woman in a skintight suit enters.

"You two need to calm down. You were exposed to the vacuum of space for quite a while." The woman says.

Tony couldn't stop looking at her. It was like looking at a goddess. The woman was perfect. She had raven black hair that flowed a little bit past her neck, a pretty face and a perfect body, all of which was made even better by her skintight suit.

"My name is Miranda Lawson. I'm going to put you through a physical to see if you're all right, then I'll have a room prepared for you."

"Miss...where are we?" Bruce asks, curious as to where he and Tony are currently at.

"You're on the Normandy. It's a ship. You're safe here." She answers as she uses an elaborate machine to scan them for internal injuries, to which they have none. "Hmm...neither of you seem to have injuries internally or externally."

"So, does this mean we're gonna be fine?" Bruce asks.

"Oh, trust me, Banner. We're gonna be more than fine..." Tony says as he eyes up Miranda in a flirtatious way, to which she simply rolls her eyes at in response.

"Anyway. You both will be getting quarters on the Normandy where you can get some sleep. Ask EDI if you need anything." Miranda says as she unstrapped Bruce from his gurney.

"Who's EDI?" The two men ask in unison.

Miranda smirks, finding it amusing that they asked at the same time. "EDI is the artificial intelligence for the ship. She aids us with anything that we can't figure out on our own."

"Oh." Bruce says, though Tony was more enthusiastic about it than him.

"You have an AI? So do I. Say hi, Jarvis." Tony says as a robotic voice is heard from his suit.

" _Hello_ , _madam_." The voice says to Miranda, who raises an eyebrow in response.

"That's Jarvis. He's my artificial intelligence." Tony says almost gloatfully.

"Very impressive. Clearly you're a man of technology." Miranda says kindly.

* * *

- **Later** -

 **Hallway**

Miranda escorts Tony and Bruce to separate rooms in a long hallway. The rooms were spacious, complete with a television, books, a large comfortable bed, and even a shower and a hot tub.

"These rooms will be...serviceable, I hope." Miranda says, to which the two men nod in approval. "Okay. Let me or EDI know if you need anything." She says before departing.

"The only thing I need is you..." Tony says under his breath, clearly desiring Miranda.

* * *

- **Bruce's Quarters** -

Bruce sighs as he looks around the room, amazed by how nice it looks before laying down on the bed. "I have no idea what's going on, Hulk...but at least the room looks great." Bruce says to Hulk subconsciously.

" _I don't care, Banner_... _but that woman_... _so pretty_.." Hulk says back in Banner's mind, clearly aroused by Miranda's stunning beauty.

Bruce sighs. "Yeah...she is." He says in agreement as he gets under the covers of the bed and falls asleep.


	2. Understanding & Past Losses

- **SSV Normandy** -

 **Bruce's Room**

Bruce wakes up in his bed, stretching and yawning as EDI's voice can be heard. " _Hello, Bruce. I trust you slept well?_ "

"I presume you're EDI?" Bruce asks as he gets out of bed and puts on some clothes that fit him perfectly.

" _You are correct. Do you require anything? Food? Scientific equipment?_ " EDI asks.

"Actually...can you tell me what this ship is?" Bruce asks, wanting to know what purposes the Normandy serves.

" _Certainly. The SSV Normandy-2 is a starship. She is a prototype "deep scout" frigate, second of the eponymous Normandy class, co-developed by Cerberus._ "

"So, this is basically some kind of military/research ship?" Bruce asks.

" _That is basically its overall purpose, yes_." EDI says.

* * *

- **The Next Day** -

 **Bar**

Bruce, Tony, Miranda, Liara, and Grunt sit at a large booth, chatting it up for quite a while as Bruce and Tony tell the others about them and their situation. The whole time this is going on, a large, muscular woman with long blond hair watches the group, though her eyes seem to be focused on Bruce.

"So, you two men are from an...alternate universe?" Liara asks, trying to wrap her mind around the concept of alternate dimensions.

Bruce nods. "Yeah. I know. It's a lot to process. Though to be fair, it's as difficult to understand as any of _this_."

Miranda chuckles as she drinks a beer. "You'll get used to it." After saying this, she gives Bruce a flirtatious look, making him blush a bit.

Tony smirks in amusement before looking at Liara. "So...you're an alien."

Liara smiles lightly as she nods her head. "Yes. I'm from the planet Thessia. My species is called the asari."

"Ooh." Tony says as he takes a sip from his beer.

"You two..." Miranda says as she leans forward. "What is your world like?"

Tony smiles. "On our world, Bruce and I are some of the smartest people in the world. I build really advanced suits of armor. Bruce on the other hand...well, let's just say whenever he gets angry, things get _really_ bad..."

"Y-You mean that green creature that we brought onto the ship?" Liara asks, receiving a nod from both Tony and Bruce. "Fascinating...! How does it happen? Please tell me."

Bruce sighs. "It's caused by anger. If I get mad enough, he comes out."

"Amazing." Liara softly says. "The creature...he seems to be very strong."

Bruce nods. "He is. At his calmest, Hulk can lift approximately 100 tons."

Miranda nods her head, clearly amazed by how powerful Hulk sounds. "Impressive."

"Sounds like my type of opponent.." Grunt says with a grin.

"Oh, trust me, big guy. You do _not_ want to fight Hulk. He can lift over 100 tons when he's calm." Bruce warns, to which Grunt gulps in fear. "Um...thanks, Miranda." Bruce says to the raven haired bombshell. "Though I think you should know I'm not the only person on our Earth that has powers."

"What do you mean?" Liara asks in puzzlement at Bruce's words. "T-There's others like you?"

"Well, not exactly like me, but yeah. There's Thor, a literal god of thunder. Vision, a synthetic android powered by a stone that holds unlimited power."

"Oh. Don't forget the guy that performs magic tricks." Tony interrupts, bringing up Doctor Strange.

"Magic? Wait. You have _magic_ on your world?" Miranda asks, obviously confused.

"Yeah. Heh." Bruce chuckles nervously. Even though he barely knew her, Miranda was absurdly beautiful and he could feel Hulk inside his mind, wanting her. "Although...not everyone in our dimension is good."

"Really? Who could exist in your dimension that could _possibly_ be a threat to you?" Liara asks, her interest in Bruce's 'condition' increasing by the second.

"Well...there's Ultron, a synthezoid that's obsessed with destroying the world. Loki, Thor's brother, who is the God of Mischief, and there's Thanos, the worst of them all. He's an alien from a planet called Titan that is hellbent on eradicating half the universe."

The entire group sits still in shock at how cruel those villains sound.

* * *

- **Later** -

 **Bruce's Quarters**

An hour after having drinks with the crew of the Normandy, the door to Bruce's quarters open up to reveal the oversized woman that was watching him. She towered over Bruce at 12 feet tall, weighing 860 pounds, and fair skinned, her long blond hair tied into a ponytail. "Whoa!" Bruce says in surprise at the woman's size, falling backwards onto the bed as the large woman walks in with a smile.

"Do not be afraid. I mean you no harm." The woman says gently as Bruce slowly stands up, amazed by the woman's size. As he looks at her, she effortlessly picks him up as if he was a stuffed animal and hugs him tightly, so tightly that Bruce could barely breathe.

"Can't...breathe..." Bruce groans out, getting the large woman to release him. After she does so, he starts coughing hard.

"A-Apologies. Sometimes I forget my own strength." She says. "Are you okay?"

Bruce groans as the coughing ceases. "Yeah. Ahh...I'm fine. I'll live." He says hoarsely as he stands up straight, looking up at the massive woman towering over him. Her size made him feel small and insignificant by comparison.

"Hi. I'm Zooka." She says as she holds out her hand. Bruce looked at it, and realized her hand was as big as Hulk's.

" _Wow, she's huge_." Bruce says internally as he shakes her hand. "Bruce."

She smiles. "Bruce. Hot name. Just saying it drives me crazy. Bruce..." She says softly, no doubt making Bruce feel very uncomfortable.

"Heh. Thanks, Zooka. Um, if you don't mind me asking...what are you, exactly?" Bruce asks.

"I'm from a planet that is fairly close to the Milky Way. I...I am the last of my people." She says as she sits on his bed and looks at the floor in sadness.

"W-What happened to them? Your people?" Bruce hesitantly asks, getting the feeling that Zooka felt great emotional pain just by thinking about it.

"They...They were slaughtered. Butchered. By the Reapers." Zooka says in answer as she starts to cry.

Bruce sits next to her and holds her hand to calm her down. "My God...Zooka, I'm so sorry..."

"They killed them...without mercy. They made me watch at they were torn apart..." Zooka says as she continues to cry.

"I can imagine how painful that must've been for you. Something very similar happened to me a few years ago." Bruce says as memories of his time on Sakaar rush back to him. "Look...I don't know why they did it, or even what a Reaper is...but I'm here for you if you need anything." Bruce says in comfort as Zooka smiles before hugging him again. As he struggles to hug her back, Tony walks past the open doorway and sees them hugging, grinning to himself.

After a while, Zooka leaves to return to her chambers for the day. Tony enters Bruce's quarters, still grinning childishly. "What, Tony? What're you so happy and chipper about?" Bruce asks, knowing something was on his mind.

"Oh...nothing. Except you got yourself a girlfriend." He says as he sits next to him.

"Tony, grow up. She isn't my girlfriend. I just met her. Besides, she...has a lot on her mind right now."

"Well, does Ms. Big and Tall have a name, at least?" Tony asks.

"Zooka. Her name is Zooka." Bruce says softly.

"Zooka...Yep. Definitely an alien." Tony jokingly says.


	3. Battle of Tuchanka

- **The Illusive Man's Office** -

Miranda stands in front of a man with glowing eyes, her arms crossed behind her back. The man looks at several screens showing Bruce Banner's intelligence and compares it to the limited data he had on Hulk. "This isn't enough data, Miranda. I need the Hulk to use his strength in action to compare it to Banner's unbridled intellect."

"I understand, sir, but the control chip I implanted into his skull will hopefully prevent him from lashing out." Miranda says.

"The Hulk will hate you forever if he finds out. Maybe this'll change your mind. Reapers were spotted on the planet Tuchanka." The Illusive Man says as he hands her a file. It detailed several Reaper types, Krogan rebels that were still on the planet, and the worst thing of all, thresher maws that the Reapers are using as attack dogs against the rebels.

"Thresher Maws?!" Miranda exclaims.

"Indeed. Somehow, the Reapers got their hands on them and are using them as war beasts against the Krogan. You are to accompany Shepard to the planet, along with Liara, Zooka, and Grunt, as well as Tony and Banner."

"You must be joking." Miranda says, finding it hard to believe he wants the new arrivals to join her on a potentially dangerous mission.

"No, Lawson. I am not joking. It's our chance to see Banner's other self in action. Besides...maybe the monster has a thing for you."

"You think the monster...loves me?" Miranda says without a hint of sarcasm in her voice.

"That's right." The Illusive Man says with a grin, something he barely ever did, if not at all.

"I'm not interested." Miranda says as she leaves his office. " _At the moment_..." She mentally adds.

* * *

- **Bruce's Quarters** -

As Bruce gets ready for bed, Miranda enters. Needless to say, Bruce was surprised, but welcomed it because she was too beautiful to resist. "Miranda. Hi."

"Hello, Bruce." Miranda says as she looks at him nervously. "Can I talk to you?"

Bruce nods with a smile. "Anything for you. What is it?"

"You and Tony will be going on a mission with me and the others. The odds of survival are slim. My boss, The Illusive Man, he wants the Hulk to emerge so he can witness his...skills in action."

"Really?" Bruce asks as he sits on the edge of his bed.

"Yes. Really." Miranda says as she sits next to him. "I'm sorry, Bruce."

"For what? It's not your fault. It's him that wants me to transform, not you." Bruce says calmly as he slowly looks at Miranda's flawless face.

"Thank you for understanding. I'll come visit you when we leave for the mission tomorrow. Get some sleep." Miranda says as she leaves the room.

* * *

- **The Next Day** -

 **Bruce's Quarters**

Bruce wakes up and gets dressed, deciding to be extra ready for the mission. As soon as he was done getting ready, Liara walks in, holstering a pistol.

"Liara." Bruce says with a smile.

"Bruce. It seems you're ready for the mission."

He nods. "Looks like it. Lead the way."

* * *

- **Shuttle Bay** -

Bruce and the others that are scheduled for the mission enter the shuttle bay, entering a shuttle.

"Why exactly are you two coming along?" Grunt asks, shotgun in hand as he sits across from them.

Tony and Bruce shrug in unison. "No idea." Bruce says.

"Orders from the Illusive Man. Orders that I disagree with 100%." Miranda answers as she gets into the shuttle, sitting next to Bruce.

"Wait. Orders?" Bruce asks in surprise, to which Miranda nods.

"Yes. He...wishes to see your other self in action, to see how powerful you really are."

Bruce groans. "The Hulk is impossible to control, Miranda. On my Earth...he's a monster."

"He always gets like this. You'll get used to it." Tony says as the shuttle leaves the Normandy and heads to the surface of Tuchanka.

* * *

- **Tuchanka** -

After several minutes of turbulence, the shuttle finally lands on a planet resembling a large desert. The group exits the shuttle and begins to explore the planet for any signs of the Reapers. Miranda sighs as she hands Bruce a pistol.

"Here." Miranda says. "You might need it."

"Uh, Miranda-"

"Bruce...you might not be able to rely on the Hulk to keep you alive." Miranda interrupts.

Tony smirks as he carries a red colored case with him, which Liara takes notice of. "Pardon me, but what's in the case?" She asks.

"A collapsible suit of armor like my other one." Tony says in answer, receiving a nod from the inquisitive asari.

It doesn't take the group long to find something, in this case being a large temple ruin, with several Krogan statues in front of it. As they walk up some stairs, they suddenly get surrounded by several Krogans, who aim guns at the group. After a few seconds, a large Krogan walks into view. He wore red armor, and had a nasty scar on the right side of his face.

"Shepard." The large Krogan says, noticing the beautiful crimson haired commander.

"Wrex. What're you doing here?" Shepard asks, happy to see an old friend.

"Someone's gotta keep this place from falling even further into hell. May as well be me, Shepard." Wrex says before noticing Bruce and Tony. "Who are those two?"

"Oh, this is Bruce and Tony. They're...not from around here." Shepard says, to which Wrex nods.

"We've been fighting Reapers for several months, Shepard. We're tired, we're losing more and more krogans each day, and ammo is getting low."

"Well, we're here. What can we do?" Right as Shepard asks this, loud rumbling could be heard as the ground shook. Seconds later, large creatures burst from the ground, roaring loudly. "Thresher Maws?!" Shepard exclaims.

"The Reapers somehow managed to take control of them!" Wrex shouted as his small army of krogans fire on the large beasts.

"Bruce, now'd be the good time to call out your friend!" Tony shouts as he opens his case and activates a mechanism that causes a compartmentalized Iron Man suit to cover him head to toe as he flies upward and fires his repulsors at a Thresher Maw, which screeches in pain.

As Bruce watches this, several Reapers appear, walking out of the hole the Thresher Maw made as they shoot at the group, narrowly missing Miranda as Zooka leaps at the Reapers and begins beating them with her fists, only to be shot in the leg and gut by a new wave of Reapers.

"Zooka!" Bruce screams as she falls onto her back. As Miranda fires at the Reapers, Bruce tosses his gun aside and transforms, roaring in anger as he leaps at the Reapers that shot Zooka, smashing them and tearing them apart with no problem.

"Wow!" Liara exclaims in awe as Hulk kills hundreds of Reapers with ease before focusing on a Thresher Maw, latching onto it as it burrows underground. Iron Man fires several miniaturized missiles at a group of Reapers, blasting them to bits as Shepard uses an assault rifle to take down several Reapers. Hulk and the Thresher Maw surface as Hulk starts punching the side of the large beast's head, which falls down to the ground dead. Hulk roars in triumph as he attacks another Thresher Maw, punching it so hard, it dies instantaneously.

" **Hulk smash ugly worm monster**!" Hulk roars like a primal beast, attacking more Reapers and Thresher Maws.

"Whoa! He can really hit hard!" Wrex says, complimenting Hulk's amazing strength as the green-skinned monster smashes more Reapers.

Miranda guns down a Reaper as another manages to get behind her and slash her leg, just behind the knee. "Ahhh!" She screams in pain. Hulk sees this and tackles the Reaper, punching it several times before ripping its head off.

" **Miranda hurt**..." Hulk said, showing genuine concern for her.

"I'll be alright, big guy. It's just a scratch. It's, uh, nice to finally see you in action." Miranda says as she lays against the dropship.

* * *

- **Later** -

Several hours pass, as the battleground is littered with corpses of Reapers and Thresher Maws. The entire group pants in exhaustion as Hulk carries Zooka into the dropship before doing the same with Miranda.

"Shepard...I can't thank you enough for helping my people." Wrex says with gratitude.

"We're friends, Wrex. It's what we do." Shepard says with a light smile.

"Your big green friend there...He's very strong. If the Reapers come after you, he's sure to protect you."

"I'm counting on it. Take care, Wrex." Shepard says as she gets in the dropship with the others, which lifts off the ground and flies towards the Normandy as the shuttle bay opens up. Once the shuttle safely lands and the bay doors close, the group exits the small aircraft. Hulk carries out Miranda while Grunt carries Zooka out as the two large brutes head towards the medical wing.


End file.
